Learning to Fail

Posts have been a bit sparse lately… I’m learning the old cliche that working moms feel like they are failing at everything.  Will I ever feel like I’m at the top of my game at anything again?

Don’t know.  Stay tuned.

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4 Comments

  1. Mommy, Esq. said,

    June 12, 2009 at 10:10 am

    I think there is truth to that but I try to pump myself up when I have blocks of time at work or with the kids that I’m Doing a Good Job. One thing I am not good at is spastically trying to do work while with the kids. I am working hard to just have kids time when I’m with them. Often means chores don’t get done and if I’m working after they go to bed I feel like they never get done. So I’m okay failing at Doing a Good Job when it comes to Being a House-wife.

  2. jerseygirl77 said,

    June 12, 2009 at 7:37 pm

    I don’t think it’s failure. I think it’s just a matter of having to redefine success. Modify expectations. It’s not about being the “best” worker or mom or housewife or whatever. It’s about focusing on one thing at a time, and doing that one thing as proficiently as possible. Find your happy medium, kwim? For me that means when I work, I focus on doing my job and not worrying about if the kids will get to bed on time or if the bathroom is clean or if I remembered to buy Grandma’s birthday card. And when I’m doing something with the kids, I have to focus them and not what’s for dinner or the emails in my inbox. (Admittedly, when we’re all in the house, it’s really hard not to get distracted by the messes that need to be cleaned and the bills that need to be paid and…) Anyway, that’s my philosophy.

  3. almostima said,

    June 12, 2009 at 9:39 pm

    You girls make valid points. It’s just that during my whole career as an attorney, while I was working long hours, I always consoled myself with “better now than when I have kids.” I always figured I’d have a plan B by now. Well, it’s 5 years later — no plan B and the days of being an absent parent are here. I know I can be a good parent, but it seems incompatible with holding on to my job for any length of time in this climate.

  4. jerseygirl77 said,

    June 15, 2009 at 11:10 am

    I understand what you mean about Plan B. I think, and correct me if I’m wrong, that we are a lot alike in the sense that we’ve always been focused. Make a plan and execute. I thought for sure I’d be a full-time mom once I had kids, but for a lot of reasons that didn’t (and won’t) happen. I didn’t have a Plan B either… I didn’t think I needed one. So the result was that Plan B was developed on the fly and continues to evolve even now. The same may happen for you… You just have to kind of keep looking for that window of opportunity to eke open just a little.


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